Ordinarily I would do all I could to avoid watching such bubblegum happiness on screen as is apparent in Glee. However, for the purpose of this music based live blogging experience, I thought I would endeavour.
Do not expect me to commend the show, it's not my cup of tea, so I plan to point out flaws wherever I can. But, if something worth a mention catches my eye, then Glee may have a chance to redeem itself.
So, a quick rundown? From what I have seen on the thrice hourly adverts (probably more) on tele, everyone in Glee is too happy. They sing at the drop of the hat, about teenage menialities, that to be honest do not need to be sung about.
To any fans, I would avoid reading this. But for your information, the episode I am going to commentate is Series 2 Episode 12: Silly Love songs. Yuk.
1min:
A horribly fast spoken boy gives us a run down on what has been happening, along with background music performed by the 'Glee Club'.
'We all know I'm not the smartest guy in the world'; Yes we do. The guy with an actual nineties Mohican hair cut on screen plunges us into a romantic soliloquy. He is staring at the first stock character of the show, a woolly hat clad larger than life girl, without the bubbly personality.
2min:
Stereotype alert: The Jock! Football player come Glee club member bowls into shot in slow motion, telling us all how great he is. It seems to be a theme with Glee, the witless introverted self-commentary. I suppose something has to fill us in on the emotions of the characters, it's not like the song singing is enough!
Next stock characters. Two overtly camp guys discussing romance. Sentiments of 'puppy love' around the holiday of Valentines day. Plastic faced Pinnochio, Kurt, is mistakenly lulled into thinking gay guy number two, Blaine, is expressing his love with him.
4min:
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6min:
The first tears of the episodes, someone feels victimised by the group. Diddums.
Back to Pinnochio and the 'Warblers'. A group of nerds with matching red striped blazers, acting like they are in supreme court situation.
9min:
Yawn. After having his illusions shattered about the 'love', Kurt and two other girls in in pyjamas discuss lost loves and not having dates for Valentines Day.
10min:
First spontaneous song of the episode, I'm surprised it has taken so long. A band playing with no wires or microphones. Where is exactly is your auto-tuned voice coming from Mohican Man? and how is it louder than the drums? The audience know exactly how to dance and sing along to a song so off the cuff, must be luck!
This is excruciating, he is serenading the big girl with an unnecessary swagger, while offending her at the same time: 'Fat bottom girl'.
13min:
The jock and his kissing shack. The beautiful girl of the show just refuses to kiss him, he is disgruntled at this, as if he cannot make do with the rest of female population of the school.
14min:
Macaulay Culkin/ Aaron Carter seems to have entered the shot. He is questioning Quinn, his own girlfriend, as to why she hasn't kissed Jock yet. Eh?
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| E4.com/glee |
Jock gives his ex-girlfriend a necklace as a present. Bit sentimental.
First appearance of the Asian guy and Wheelchair lad is now upon me. 'We're dope'. Cue spontaneous song number two. Actually fairly catchy, but the slow motion dancing of the Asian guy needs to decease. The overt over-cranked glibness of Wheels is grinding. Guitar man is back, still with no wire or amp.
17min:
Girl fight! Yes! granted it between Crying girl and Behemoth, but it will suffice anyhow. This is the first time I have been entertained thus far. Lauren, clearly with a weight advantage, proceeds to through her opponent to into walls, until masculine head football coach women splits it up.
20min:
Quinn and Finn, the 'attractive' people of the show, just kissed. There were actual fireworks on screen. I still can't tell if this programme is intentionally taking the piss out of itself, but it is doing a great job.
Intermission:
I cannot believe I have another twenty minutes of this.
21min:
Back to the blazer boys. Singing a song in Gap, the shop. The leader is attempting to serenade his scraggly haired crush, while walking around the shop sporting various display sunglasses. Where has the background music come from? I can't see anyone with a Guitar anymore, why did you leave us Guitar man? I was beginning to warm to you!
24min:
'Was it too much?'
Yeah mate, I think it was.
25min:
All the Glee-ers are being couply, how has Wheels managed to bag the best looking girl?
Santana Lopez, the bully, is now filling our ears. She plans to foil Quinn and Finn in their affair. She kisses an anonymous sick boy's Mono germs, and proceeds to pay Jock Finn with her germs. Ending in a mono pandemic, brilliant.
27min:
Mohican is now fake proposing to Lauren, with a candy ring. Figures.
29min:
Blaine, the rejected blazer leader is now doubting the whole romance thing, ashamed of making a fool of himself. Pinnochio confesses his love for Blaine.
This all is getting very mundane, am I actually hoping for a song to break the monotony. Is this how Glee captivates its huge audience? By leading them to beg for respite after each cheesy narrative sequence.
33min:
Attractive bitchy girl now reveals her ploy. Everyone has got Mono. Mono mono mono.
Nasal whispering doesn't do Quinn any justice. She should keep her mouth shut.
Mohican Man finally gets his date with the big girl!
36min:
I'm finding it hard to pick out things to write about, glad it's nearly over.
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| E4.com/glee |
Rachel, the least hate-able character so far, is now singing Katy Perry's Firework. She is doing it justice, she has got pipes. This is the first time that there has been a performance that I have not hated a little bit; fair play. I'm still not on board with how everyone joins in, and how there is actually fireworks in the background though.
39min:
Pinnochio is making a speech about lonely hearts or something, before singing a song with the Warblers. 'Do you think about people have had enough of singing silly love songs?', hell yeah Blaine. Oh no, he's going to do it anyway. At least I know this crescendo means we are nearing the end of the episode.
Do do do, ba ba ba, and it's done.
End credits:
Well that's over, and I'm not as horrifically scarred by my experience as I thought I would be. I expected to hate the characters more, and myself more for actually watching it.
Alas, I will never be a regular watcher, and will probably still turn it over when it starts on a Monday night. However, some of these actors/actresses clearly have talent, so why not use the fame from Glee to move onto a proper singing career? That way some good can come of it - not that I will listen.
http://www.channel4.com/programmes/glee/4od
This is good Sherlock :)
ReplyDeleteI think the target market would be people that are following your blog yea? as opposed to people being interested in glee? So it doesn't matter that you've been critical of it because you've sort of ruled them out as an audience at the beginning, so it works.
Tres bien :)